What Should I Do With The Pain I Feel?


I have a friend…let’s call him Ed…and Ed had a bad experience at the beach.

If you’re about to go to the beach, I don’t want you to have the same experience Ed had.

Ed and his family go to the same beach every year early in the summer…right after school gets out.

The beach trip is the big vacation of the year for Ed’s family. It’s been a tradition since even before his kids were born.

Every year, Ed’s family goes to the same beach and rents the same house. They’ve been renting the house for so long they’re like family with the people who own the house they rent.

The beach trip is a big deal.

I talked to Ed not too long ago. I asked him about this year’s beach trip.

“It was terrible,” he said. “The worst beach trip of my life.”

How could that be?

Bad weather?


Shark bite?

“We got an early start this year,” Ed said. “So we got to the beach around noon.”

“That’s great!” I said.

“I unloaded the car while everyone was getting their bathing suits on and then we all hit the beach,” he said.

“Perfect,” I said.

“We stayed out until dinner time,” he said.

“Sounds like you had a great first day,” I said.

“It couldn’t have been better,” he said. “Except for one thing.”

“What’s that?” I asked.

“I was in such a rush to get on the beach I didn’t put on sunscreen. I got fried!” he said.

“That’s terrible!” I said.

“It was really bad, Alan,” he said. “We’re not talking one of those pink sunburns. I was purple. Have you ever seen someone with a purple sunburn?”

“Yes…it must have been really painful” I said.

“Excruciating,” he said. “And that’s why it was the worst beach trip we’ve ever had. I got burned on the first day and had to spend the entire week in the house nursing my sunburn. I was so frustrated!”

I felt so bad for Ed.

I could almost feel the intense pain he had felt during that week.

I teach about pain when I work with clients.

Everybody has pain. It’s something we can’t avoid.

We have physical pain, like what Ed felt from his sunburn.

And we also have emotional pain…pain we feel inside from choices we’ve made in the past or from things other people have done to us.

What I teach people is that ignoring pain never works. If you ignore the pain in your life, one of two things is going to happen:

  1. the pain won’t stop
  2. you’ll develop a different type of pain somewhere else

Believe it or not, pain has value in our lives.

What is the value?

Pain has value as a teacher. Pain has value as a guide.

Pain tells you when to ease up. Pain tells you stop. Pain tells you when to re-direct. Pain tells you when to reverse course. Pain tells you when to rest.

Pain sends many different messages.

We can learn and grow from pain.

But if you aren’t learning and growing from the pain in your life…it’s not going to stop.

Imagine if Ed had gone out in the sun AGAIN the next day…imagine the situation he’d be in!

If you’re a leader, don’t ignore your pain. I’m a pro at helping people like you get from where they are right now to where they want to be in the future. Email me HERE to set up a time to talk about your specific needs.

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